In this Life of Sin

When all you have for family is a Mother, friends tend to make up for what is lacking. To me a friendship is highly respected. Not anyone can be a friend to me. I've had people come and go in my life all my life so I chose those who I feel are going to be there and who I won't hesitate to be there for myself. I don't have much. My friends are my family because in reality, that's all I have.

When I love, I love hard. I will ride for you if you need me to be. The most I ask back for in return is the same thing. Do you know how it feels to sincerely be happy for someone. To freely say, yea that's my girl and mean it. To know that if anyone were to even step near my friend with bad intent in their heart how fast I would be there to defend. But something I've realized is that not everyone will go hard as I do. So I need to chose more wisely. And so I'm betrayed, once again.

The worst thing for anyone to do to me is betray me when all I've done is respect that person. My mother taught me that friend's don't friend a friends enemy. Those were her words that were passed to me and I live by them. Loyalty and trust should be two things I should never have to ask for. Ever. And I can't even get that. To have someone look you in your eyes and basically tell you I don't care, I do what I want. lol, all I can do is laugh while teary eyed. My heart feels black and the thoughts running in my mind won't leave my lips. You know why? Because loyalty and trust are two things you don't need to ask to get from me. But like I said, not everyone is like me. Not everyone has the same values I hold. Not everyone lives and loves like I do.

But hey, this is my life, and I'll get over this, what has happened. I will, I never stay mad, harboring negative energy inside makes me feel nasty so I always let things go. But I never forget. Ever. And I don't plan on it. Girls chose niggas over their "girls" Lol She chose my ex over me lol. And all I can do is laugh while sitting teary-eyed. Oh but trust me the tears won't fall. They will sit there to remind me that this is what she's done. It's alright. God and Karma will come when they down.

All I need in this life of Sin is someone to hold me down as much as I will hold them down. That's the way I was brought up, and that's what the streets taught me. But I'm not in the streets anymore. This is college, fake filled and all. But it's cool. Nothing will hold me down.

If you think I'm easily influenced, you are easily mistaken - Alexa